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Mentioning your ex -- or any other failed relationships. This should go without saying: Don't bring up your ex or other low-points in your romantic history. Divorce may have taught you what you categorically don't want in a new partner, but don't waste valuable space in your profile listing out negative traits you don't want in your life. Your word count is out of control. Adopt the Goldilocks principle when considering the length of your profile: Not too short, not too long, but just right. You want to tell a story about yourself that's intriguing but leave the whole story for the dates to come.

Your username is forgettable.

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You send an awkward first message. You now have the tools to write a profile that hits all the right marks, but remember: